Family-Sensitive Ministry

by Karen Pennings

My family played a significant role in my faith development. When I was a young girl, it seemed that we were always at church when the doors were open, and sometimes when they weren’t. I have fond memories of helping my parents clean our church on Saturdays. My brothers and I would help my mother vacuum or assist my dad as he buffed the floors in the fellowship hall.

We learned Bible stories at bedtime and around the dining room table with our extended family. We ministered together. My mother would use fabric scraps from the clothes she made for us to make stuffed animals. Then we’d take the stuffed animals to the local children’s hospital for the nurses to distribute to patients. We also ministered together with our church. Once a month, my family would meet with other members of our church for dinner at a local nursing home. My mother would play the piano while we sang to the residents. I stood alongside my parents and other adults as we ministered together as a church family.

What Is a Family?
Many churches delight in their family-oriented ministry. They support the day-to-day life of the family by catering ministries and activities to the typical family model. However, the model they use is often a husband and wife with children. Ministries and activities are crucial for the traditional family, but in our ever-changing society, church congregations also include people in nontraditional family relationships. Today, families can include single parents, grandparents caring for grandchildren, single adults, divorced adults, married couples without children, widows and widowers, and others.

Each of these groups is a family, but some churches may unintentionally fail to fit these families into a family ministry plan. To compensate, the church segregates ministries into specialized activities and events: children, youth, single adults, married adults, senior adults, and others. The respective groups have individual activities, and they rarely minister together in order to grow as a “faith family.”

Develop a Family-Ministry Plan
Take a moment and consider your church experience. Most likely, you have a diverse range of age groups and families in your congregation. How can you encourage diversity and intergenerational activities? One strategy for including more diverse and nontraditional families is to develop or revise a family ministry plan. Examine your church and choose an issue that you think needs to be addressed—for example, certain family groups that are being ignored, more intergenerational ministry opportunities, or a specific topic relevant to your church faith family. First, determine what information you need to develop a plan. Consider conducting a survey, forming committees, or interviewing church members. Second, decide whether you will focus on specific families in your congregation and/or community or on all families in your congregation and/or community. Third, plan the goals and the details of your family ministry plan. Finally, determine a way to measure the success of your plan. Ask questions like these: How can I recognize that this plan has succeeded? What changes do I hope will occur in our faith family once these ministries begin?

Family-Sensitive Worship Services
Another strategy is to develop a more family-sensitive worship service. This does not necessarily mean making worship family-themed in the sermon, Scripture passages, music, and all other elements. Rather, it means using and celebrating the God-given family relationships within the church. Consider inviting people of all ages to participate in various aspects of the worship service (reading Scripture, praying, greeting, etc.). Also, consider how your worship service can encourage children to worship alongside adults, and try to make it meaningful for both age groups. As they worship together, children can learn from adults, and adults can learn from children.

Family-Sensitive Congregational Life
A third strategy is to nurture family sensitivity in congregational life. In what ways can your church develop ministry to faith families? One example is to involve nontraditional families in ministry alongside traditional families. Encourage single adults and children to work with widows and widowers. Encourage intergenerational ministries and activities. Your congregation’s life can be transformed by a newly-developed family perspective.

Family-Sensitive Ministries
When a church decides to become more sensitive to faith families, the results can be astounding. Walls of division begin to disintegrate as people redefine “family.” Specialized ministries become generalized. Adults minister alongside children and vise versa. Congregations begin to reach beyond the traditional idea of family and the traditional idea of ministry to become a faith family that includes the entire congregation.